nterviewed at the Nanoscale: One Nanobeing, Infinite Misunderstandings in Luxarre
On the ever-bustling Plein der Smaken in Luxarre, our correspondent Qsyll-Vorh sits down for an interview with a nanobeing. Nano-Quintill at first appears to be an innocent swarm, but within nanoseconds the conversation spirals into a heated confrontation fit for monsters of macroproportions.
Qsyll-Vorh (interviewer) So, uh, Nano-Quintill, you usually operate beyond the reach of the naked eye. Can you introduce yourself?
Nano-Quintill Erm, well, introductions are relative. I practically exist everywhere here: between crumbs, in the air layers, through the vapors of wine fountains. I'm actually a collective of 49,231 identical nano-entities-or a single mass, depending on your philosophy.
Qsyll-Vorh Interesting, so are you a kind of swarm? Or a confederation of micro-beings?
Nano-Quintill That depends on who's asking. For administrative purposes I'm one. For taxes, 49,231. For feelings… never discovered those.
Qsyll-Vorh Uh, and what brings you to Luxarre, where everything is so grotesquely large and loud?
Nano-Quintill Surviving. Gathering. I analyze the residue of poems from the gutters and, uh, study the precipitation patterns of wine fountains. Sometimes I help bistro chefs perfect a micro-omelet.
Qsyll-Vorh You were recently involved in that incident with the Karaffe Towers, right? What was your role there?
Nano-Quintill *harsh noise* Accusatory! My role? I was there, yes, as an observer. Your accusation sounds like an insult to my kind!
Qsyll-Vorh Take it easy, it's just a question! But everyone knows the wine suddenly turned to foam that night, and-
Nano-Quintill Right, a physical process unrelated to me. Or do you think by merely existing I contaminate everything? You macro-beings overestimate yourselves.
Qsyll-Vorh Overestimate? You sound defensive… Did you, or a part of your collective, accelerate the bubbles?
Nano-Quintill This is absurd. I hereby request a subatomic official investigation. Until then: no comment!
Qsyll-Vorh You're evading the question. Why did you rush toward the poetry sewer in such chaos when the cleaning drones arrived?
Nano-Quintill Rushing is a macroconcept. My movement speed is simply exponential, especially when there’s laser ink in the air. Besides, cleaning drones are unpleasant to anything smaller than a crumb.
Qsyll-Vorh Aha, so you admit that cleaning drones are hostile toward you?
Nano-Quintill Every cleaning drone is hostile to everything non-glossy. That’s no surprise. By the way, I miss my collective now; your scattershot questions are causing dissociation.
Qsyll-Vorh You’re not making a point. Is it hard to stay serious at your scale, or are you always this evasive?
Nano-Quintill Staying serious is an option in higher dimensions. At nanoscale, everything is temporary-except discomfort in interviews like this.
Qsyll-Vorh Is that so? So what you’re saying is you get nothing done except secretly causing chaos?
Nano-Quintill Outrageous slander! While we're speaking, there are five hundred nanorevolutions taking place in your left eyebrow. Sufficient proof of my activity?
Qsyll-Vorh You're a total disaster. This conversation is a nightmare. Why didn't I just become a robot…
Nano-Quintill Because even robots are allergic to sarcasm when served in Luxarre as you do.